Underground Classifieds
![]() | |
|
FOR SALE CHEAP: One slightly used magic gem with teleport spell permanently cast upon it. Spells destination is iffy, in the general vicinity of The Abyss. Great for a gag gift, inlaws, enemies, kender, and greedy dwarves. Asking for 20stl but will negotiate. Contact Scamar Tist at Notacrook@thievesguild.org
Sell rat. Very smelly. Dead long time. Good, good, yummy rat. Much yummy rat stew. Me Glurp. Look for in glurp@gullidwurf.cam
For Sale: Device of Time Journying. Slightly damaged. Must sell! Will accept any offer. Contact Tasslehoff at tasslehoff@solace.net
For sale, used spellbooks. LOTS of used spellbooks at must-go prices! Contact wizards@wayreth.com
Affordable beachfront property! Prime land in the now liberated Qualinesti! 10 acres of land in the legendary elven city of Qualinost. No more dragon to fear! Some areas may be slightly singed. Sold 'as is'. Contact Gil with offer at 1 (800) ELF-KING.
SEEKING ROOMATE: Male elf seeks roommate to share multi level tower in scenic woodland location. Room and Board provided. Friendly neighbors. Pool of Seeing on premises. Contact fiveholes@darkelf.net
JOIN TODAY!-
JOIN TODAY!-
Help Wanted: full-time positions available immediately in the Army of the One God. Love of travel a plus. Contact Mina at mina@onegod.net to set up an interview. We are an equal opportunity employer.
Wanted: edditers kneaded too prof-red fictin novvels form a populer fantesy seeries. No experyence nessessery. Contact dl-staff@wizards.com.
SEEKING: Young strong wizards with a bright future. You may be my last chance. Email: Fisty@hotmail.com
PLEASE KILL ME!! Any way you can, please kill me! Will offer cash bonus if I stay dead for more than a month!! Contact me at firstmaster@citadeloflight.org
Discreet and Confidential Escort Service.
LOOKING FOR WORK
Does it seem like the magic is gone? Lost your profession due to the gods leaving? Contact Tolstrup Attornies at law. We are going to make those bastards pay. fightback@tolstrup.com
Tavin's Recovery Service- Has someone taken something from you? Do you want it back? Do you want it back now? Call the professional at taking things! CALL NOW: 1-888-POCKETS
LOOKING FOR TWIN BROTHER!! Goes by the name of Raistlin or Raist. Stringy white hair, coppery skin, hourglass eyes, very frail. Good magic user. If you've seen my brother, contact me at drunkard@solace.net |
Knight Seeks Woman in Shining Armor: (Male Seeking Female, 28 years old, 6'4" tall) Knight in shining armor seeks woman of the same. If you are looking for honor, integrity, and love in a well oiled suit of armor look no further. Must enjoy jousts, duels to the death, heavy drinking and making love in armor. Looking for that solid foundation to rest your weary helm upon, than look no further. Please send picture of your armor with or without you in it. Contact me at platemale@armory.com
SG+M looking looking for S*F. 1337 guy looking for an 1337 grrl. lets stay up night tinkering with your b4wx, and I'll compile your code all night long. Email r4i5t1in@dragonlanceunderground.com
Irda Male seeking Irda Female. I am tall, thin, desperate and beautiful. Hoping to find the same. I enjoy laughing at the lesser races and watching snail races in the early morning mist. Contact me at loveisblue@yahoo.com
23yr old male kender looking for upbeat gal with lots of cool stuff. Lots of cool stuff a must. Email Tavin@springfingers.com
Fat balding smelly lazy repulsive unemployed dwarf seeks stout female loveslave to fetch ale, cook meals, pick up dirty clothes, and suck toes. Contact me at beerbelly@hylar.net
SWM seeks F: Must find me funny, charming, and exceedingly more handsome than Steve Miller. A working knowledge of bar etiquette and willingness to quietly respect frequent diatribes a must. A good dirty martini recipe a definate bonus. Ask for me at the Inn of the Next to Last Home, or email raisted@dragonlanceunderground.com
Are you an attractive minotaur with birthing hips, shapely udders, fine body hair and a nice rack? Here's a minotaur who will treat you well regardless of your personality. Contact me at mooveme@theherd.com
LETSBUILDABEAUTIFULFOUNDATIONTOGETHER-Sing
Lonely mage looking for magess to rule the world with. 20 something brilliant mage looking for a tactically minded magess hell bent on world domination. Knowledge of war and battle tactics a must! Looking forward to long nights in front of a romantic fireplace scheming atrocities against all things good and decent. Contact me at GoldenBoy@dragonlanceunderground.com
Seeking someone to spend all eternity with. Have stronghold with choir. Email lsoth@nightlund.com
Vivacious GullyDwarf, 47, seeks gully with same taste. Must have own teeth. Contact at twoteeth@dragonlanceunderground.com
Kender need love too! Female kender seeks like minded Male - If you enjoy spending long nights in jail cells, trying to find alternate entrances to any esablishment, finding things, and being kicked out of stores, shops, taverns, inns, cities, homes, mage towers, dragons dens, caves, tents, castles, ships, laboratories, schools, libraries, outhouses and chicken coops we already have twenty things in common! Lets get together and find out how many pouch items we have together! Contact me at kendermaid@wanderlust.com
SMF with neglectful husband seeking companion with interests in art and travel. Sorcerers need not apply. Email usha@solace.net
MWM seeks willing F to expand his ever growing empire. Looking for lucky wife number 13. Must be good with many, many children. Hiking, swimming, bicycling, and long romantic moonlit strolls on the beach are appreciated as long as I don't have to be there. Gully Dwarves need not apply. Contact raistlame@dragonlanceunderground.com
Shy, sensitive male looking for a long-term companion. Must appreciate fine arts, fine dining, quiet evenings, long talks, and gardening. Must enjoy role-playing, at the kitchen table and in the bedroom. Willingness to wear school uniforms (of both genders) a plus. Contact niltsiar@dragonlanceunderground.com.
Looking for the Almighty: Young Single Female looks for The One Perfect God. Interested in sharing time with the One True God. Applicants must be Omnipotant, control the dead, and be the true One God. All others need not apply. Contact me at mina@dragonlance.com
BWF seeking female for working partnership and possible relationship. Must know what she wants and be willing to work with me in several projects. Also seeking single male, preferably submissive, but if not, that can be fixed. Must enjoy having two female bosses to train him for his work. Contact LadyRaist@dragonlanceunderground.com |
Dragonlance Underground is owned and operated by Mages of the Plains.
Dragonlance is a registered trademark of Wizards of the Coast, Inc. All contents are copyright of their respective owners. Please refer to our Legal Page.