Tavin's Nugget of Joy 3-4-01
Today on Krynn:
| What? He's Gone Again? - Noted Krynnish Investigative Reporter, Tavin Springfingers has turned up missing again, to the surprise of no one. His current whereabouts are unknown, however eyewitnesses last spotted him in the company of Mr. Scamar Tist. Local Authorities questioned Mr. Tist, who reportedly made the statement. "He could be in the Abyss for all I know." A transcript documenting Tavin's interview was found, however the latter portion of the interview was marred with tar and thus offered no clue to his disappearance. Today on Krynn has offered a 500 steel piece reward for information that leads to Tavin Springfingers, payable when they get their payroll back. Tavin—wherever you are—come home.
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| An Offer You Can't Refuse - The Knights of Neraka announced today that they will be implementing phase two of their extensive campaign to bolster their flagging public relations. The first, as many will remember, occurred last year, when they changed their organization's name from the Knights of Takhisis to the Knights of Neraka. Phase two, however is far more ambitious. Long known as greedy, sneaky, dastardly, conniving, amoral, depraved, and vicious ruffians, fallen from their honor, the Knights of Neraka now seek to totally erase that stigma. "The public has never really understood our intentions," said Knights of Neraka representative Fil Ip Morus. "Our only goal is to make Ansalon a better place for all races." To teach people this message, the Knights of Neraka have set up free instructional camps. The Knights will seek out qualified individuals, provide them with a free escort to the camp, give them free food and lodging, an intensive exercise program, and instruction in the true ways of the knighthood. "So committed are we to this campaign," Ip Morus said, "That we will not rest until every man woman and child has embraced our message. Even if it kills them."
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| A Mystery Solved - In Throtl, the goblins of the Hurk clan are being honored for discovering the first known specimen of the mythical Giant Goatsucker Bird. "We was sittin' 'round the fire drinkin'," said Grawk, "when all o' a sudden this big ol' bird come runnin' righ' into the village, flappin' i's wings and throwin' feathers all o'er. So we gots our bows and shot it." No one is sure why the elusive Goatsucker Bird tried to attack a goblin village, nor is anyone certain why it shouted, "No wait guys! It's me!" just before they shot it. The body of the Goatsucker has been stuffed and will be displayed at Volma's Exotic Bestiary in Solanthus. The goblin village was paid handsomely for their find.
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| Other Lands - The Ergothian trading ship Sea Nymph, missing for three years, returned to port today. According to the testimony of it's captain and crew, it was blown leagues off course, where it discovered a new continent. Called Taladas, this amazing land seemed very alien to the men of Ansalon. They brought back many strange artifacts to back up their stories. Although people genuinely believe the stories of Captain and Crew, no one seems very interested. Captain Jaimsor Rans has vowed to begin a "Travel to Taladas" campaign to encourage the exploration of these new lands.
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That's all for Today on Krynn.
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