Ladies and Gentlemen, it's been quite some time since I talked to you last. Alas, such is the nature of kender, and while I may not settle down in my lifetime, it remains good tidings to you readers, as I will continue to see the world and all of its peculiarities until the day that the Gods take me to live with them. With that said, I am proud to bring you once again-
Tavin's Nugget of JOY 03-08-04
A Today on Krynn Special Report:
At Palanthas today rages a Public Relations war, the likes of which has never been witnessed before. Thousands of men from every conceivable walk of life have congregated both inside and outside one of the most famous and influential towns in Krynn's history for a Gay Rights march. Homosexuality has long been a taboo topic, skirted around and avoided by even the most legendary Bards and Loremasters. Today, however, there is NO avoidance of the subject. Flowers and singing can be seen and heard at every street corner, and boisterous voices fill the air. Indeed, the event seems jubilant, more like a celebration than a demonstration, but to some, it's understandably so. Dent Colwin took the time to explain. "There's simply nothing for us to be ashamed of.", Dent laughed. "Gay men have stayed in the dark for countless centuries, worried about being ostracized for how they feel. But now we're on the dawn of a new era, and the time is right for us to stand up and speak out. To tell Krynn that its okay to be Gay. That we're people too, and the only difference between us and anyone else is our chosen lifestyle."
For those of our readers who don't know, Dent Colwin, a Red Mage from the School of High Sorcery, recently made a name for himself in magical news by being the first Mage since the Gods returned to effectively harness both the wild magic of Krynn itself as well as the old magic bestowed upon the Orders by the Gods. Today, Dent leads a faction of Magi in the demonstration that refers to quite fittingly as the "Rainbow Robes". The Rainbow Robes are a faction of Magi that have recently committed themselves to being openly gay, and spreading information to the masses about the reality of homosexuality. This same faction is heading today's demonstration. We interviewed Palin Majere, spokesman for the Order, and he told us that "Officially, the Order does NOT recognize the 'Rainbow Robe' faction. However, the Order has always supported the workings and affiliations of its members, as long as it doesn't have an adverse affect on their role WITH the Order." By adverse affects, Majere is likely referring to recent allegations that two of the Orders most legendary members, Raistlin Majere and Magius may both have been homosexual. Palin dismisses these rumors by stating that "such rumors can neither be confirmed or disproven."
Not everyone is as accepting as the Order of this rally, however. The Solamnic Knights, their ranks steeped in ages of strict rules and discipline regarding every faction of life seem to be the most outspoken rival to the Gay factions as they commence activities and protests. The Knights of Takhisis, despite being classic rivals, also quite vocally disprove of the goings on today. Both parties have a presence in Palanthas, and both have also signed a non violence statement that disallows the use of any physical force against the demonstrators at any time with the exception of self defense. City officials are, of course, skeptical as to how well this will work. So far, however, the only clashes between any faction present has stayed at a verbal level.
We questioned Second Major Gerrard Brightcrown, of the Knights of the Sword about his feelings on the matter. "I find it to be morally decadent.", Gerrard said. "The Gods created men and women to be together. THAT is the natural order of things. To go against that order is to defile nature itself, and the Solamnics simply do not tolerate such things." Our own statistical journalist, Kronn Vindelsen rebukes the statement made by Gerrard. "In my own investigative reporting, I delved into the Solamnic underground and found out that nearly thirty-two percent of their order consists of homosexually active members. That's the largest percentage for any known organized group. Even the Knights of Takhisis sport only twenty-one percent." When asked why he felt that the numbers were so high in that particular order, Gerrard said, "Well, we're looking at a lot of big guys swinging big swords. It's bound to happen sooner or later. I think that such a rigid social structure will inevitably drive some of its members to seek comfort in the arms of the only ones who could truly understand how difficult it is- another member of said social structure. And seeing as how only five percent of the current Solamnic order are female, that should give a good indication as to the chances that said relationship will be of a male - female type.
Another demonstrator, Virgil Rearguard, who represents a smaller faction withing the Gay Rights demonstrators had this to say, "Huma was Gay. If you check historical records, you would see that the closest person that Huma ever got to was Magius. Oh, we all hear the legend about him being in love with a Dragon, but that's just dramatic effect. A way to make the story interesting. Let's face it. NOBODY would ever fall in love with a Dragon." Rearguard represents a faction known as the Gay Blacksmiths Association. Sporting the slogan, "We don't just bang metal", the GBA has been the forerunner of many small demonstrations, as well as helping out Gay couples in trouble.
As the day moves on, the question remains. What will be the outcome of this demonstration? At this point, its impossible to really determine the effect that today will have, for good or for ill, or what the future may hold. The one thing we can rely on is the comment made by one passer-by, a Gruk Bulbup. "OH! Me like all pretty colors here!"
That concludes this Today on Krynn Special Report
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