Ladies and gentlemen, we here at the Palanthas Times wish to remind you of a few safety tips while you celebrate this Easter holiday.
And now, without further ado, we give you Tavin's Creme-Filled, Chocolate-Covered Nugget of Joy!
Tavin's Nugget of JOY 04-11-04
Today on Krynn:
| Better than Chocolate Hatchlings! Easter Festival activities on the Dairly Plains came to a tragic and bloody halt today as several large tribes of Plainsmen were attacked and summarily slaughtered by a migrating group of Metallic Dragons. This news came as a shock to many, as the Metallic Dragons have always been known to be kind and just, never attacking without provocation. The Palanthas Times sent in Investigative Reporter/ Acceptable Casualty, Tavin Springfingers to investigate. While the kender reporter did not die as was hoped, he did uncover an amazing and tragic misunderstanding. Every year, many Plainsmen tribes congregate to cement relations between other clans and tribes. While the adults talk trades and pacts, traditionally, the children all participate in what is known as The Great Hunt. Symbolizing the duty that each child will adopt as an adult as protector and provider for his or her tribe, the children are unleashed across the congregation plain at the Festival's camp to search high and low for decorated, brightly colored eggs hidden by the adults while the children slept. Finding the most eggs gains a child much respect from the adults while also cementing in all the children the importance of scavenging for food if necessary. However, during this particular Great Hunt, a flock of dragons were flying nearby. Curious as to the happenings, they ventured closer. The dragons were outraged at the sight of human kids looking high and low for colored eggs (some of which were gilded with metal), and laughing heartily all the while. The dragons, whose wounds at the loss of their stolen children during the War of the Lance grew furious at the percieved mockery of their plight, and in a gust of rage and indignity attacked the plainsmen, with devastating swiftness. As of now, there is no word as to any resolution to this unfortunate turn of events. As always, we will have more news on the issue as it reaches us. Until then, be certain to keep one eye on your children and the other on the skies... just in case.
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| Rabbitslayer came back too, is he also a saviour? During this time of year, there are a lot of talk about life, death, and ressurection. Indeed, many different groups tend to show up out of nowhere, claiming that their personage of worship has come back to save everyone. This year has been no different. The names change, but the idea always remains the same. As part of The Palanthas Times' Human Interest Section, we decided to take a good look at a few of these groups and talk a bit about what they believe and why. Not surprisingly, the first on our list are the "Dedicated of Majere". We don't mean the God Majere, either. No, we are talking about the infamous Raistlin Majere himself. Ever since his recorded death, people have had "sightings" of this legendary mage all across the world. Some are quite unbelievable... and others are spookily truthful in their depictions. The most famous and widely accepted of these sightings is the Summer of Flame sighting. It is one of the few times that a sighting can not only be corraberated reliably with multiple sources, but also using sources of undeniable credibility, such as Palin majere, a great magi in his own right. The Dedicated claim that although ultimately defeated in his rumored bid for the world, Raistlin keeps a watchful eye from the afterlife, supposedly on equal footing with the Gods themselves. According to the Dedicated, Raistlin is simply waiting for the right time to continue his domination and purification of the world, and that only those who believe in him when it happens will have a place in his newly remade world. On the opposite side of the spectrum we have the group that calls themselves "Brothers of Burrfoot". Now it is the claim of these folks that the saviour of the people is actually the well known kender hero, Tasslehoff Burrfoot. They point to the fact that he has (to the best of anyone's knowledge) posession of the fabled time travelling device. How is this so different from the idea of Raistlin, you ask? Well, they don't believe that Tasslehoff is coming to save the world, they believe that he already HAS saved the world. In fact, they say that he has done so on several occasions. To help humanity, you ask? Not so, says the brotherhood. They are all quick to point out that each time that the kender supposedly saved everyone, it was always unintentional. Completely by mistake on the part of Tasslehoff. They claim that it is nothing more than blind luck that directed Tasslehoff to do what he did, but they are all more than willing to bet that this same luck will save them yet again, when the time comes. Not surprisingly, neither side has any actual hard evidence to support their claims. But there's always a chance that some evidence just might.... come back to save them.
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Dat Wascally Wabbit
The countryside around the borderlands of Throtl are being terrorized in their homes by a group of strange felons. According to eyewitness reports, a gang of Easter Bunnies have started ransacking and setting fire to small villages in the borderlands. "They were merciless," one farmer recalls. "They were no ordinary rabbits! These rabbits had a mean streak a mile wide! And big, sharp, pointy teeth!" In an effort to discern these evil bunnies from the rest of the pack, an artist produced the following likeness of one of the killer bunnies, using detailed accounts according to a half dozen eye witnesses.It is importnat to note that law enforcement abroad is still skeptical as to whether or not these are indeed real bunnies. Several villages have formed scouting parties to track down and kill these fiends. As they move off in search of demonic rabbits with bows and carrots in hand, we wish them well and happy hunting.
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This concludes today's segment of Today on Krynn!
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